How to handle tough conversations in project management

I have seen people who have recently moved into a project management role, and they find it tough to have hard conversations with third-party vendors, team members, management, or any other person they are planning to have a conversation with.

I try to understand why these situations arise, what the reasons are, and what leads to this behavior where people don’t want to have hard conversations or don’t know how to handle them.

When people want to have a hard conversation, they often believe that others are trying to take advantage of them, demean them, demotivate them, or overpower them. These situations do appear.

However, there are a few ways to overcome these challenges.

First, if you don’t know something in front of others, just tell them that you can’t give a confirmation right now, you have to check, and you’ll get back to them. This is the best way.

The reason behind this approach is that in the project management landscape, you don’t know everything. You have to rely on your team, and as a new project manager, you might face many hurdles.

Project management evolves with experience, and you won’t be able to do everything on your own. You can’t be a master of all trades. So, you have to rely on your team’s experience and different people’s expertise.

Second, whenever you’re having a discussion, do your homework beforehand. Study and learn new things because as you grow in the role, the learning process needs to increase. You have to face many challenges on multiple fronts.

Another thing to keep in mind is that whenever you’re having a discussion, mention that the questions being asked are good and that you’ll double-check with your team and come back to them.

Also, when you’re doing your homework, ask many questions and reach out to multiple people to understand the nuances of the project in detail.

Over time, you’ll gain experience, confidence, and won’t feel naive. You’ll be able to ask questions and challenge the hypothesis behind the project. Another important thing is to identify a mentor for the project.

Mentors can guide you and can be anyone, either within or outside your job.

You shouldn’t be afraid to go to someone and ask questions about deliverables. Give honest feedback about yourself and the project to the mentors and ask for their guidance.

One thing to learn is that your job is to manage people and the project, not individual tasks. You have to manage the complete project and how people are performing tasks.

When you don’t know something, it’s no shame to ask for help from others. Keep your ego aside and remember that when the project wins, your team wins, and you win. If you do that, people will start falling in line.

Also, please remember that you don’t have to act like you know everything. That’s probably the worst tactic you can deploy. You know what you’re having, and the conversation should be around your expertise. If you have doubts, just tell them that you’ll get back to them.

This is how you can plan any kind of hard conversation you want to have.